In a Lull

Life seems to have slowed to almost a complete stop the past week or so, while we await release of our final marks. Somehow it seems like nothing else can happen until I receive notification of my grades on 11th July. So I wait....

I spent a few days with a fellow student in London last week. We reflected on all the hard work we've done to get this far, and shared our growing anxiety about "the wait."

I came home on Sunday and again....I wait.... I fill the hours with books and music, but there's an underlying tension throughout the hours while I wait. I'm considering going to Scotland for a week, but I'm reluctant to make plans until after the 11th, so I wait. I'm confident enough about my results that I've already informed my family that I won't be coming home to Canada this summer, and yet there's that teeny little bit of uncertainty that holds me back from making different plans. So I wait....

I have a stack of books on medical anthropology at my elbow that I've been browsing through. I'm becoming more and more certain that this is the direction I want to pursue for grad studies. I've been looking at the university websites -- McGill, Oxford, Toronto, Cambridge -- checking out requirements and course offerings and deadlines for application submission. I need another year at LSE to finish my BSc, but in many cases, applications for Sept 08 admission to grad school must be sent in by Dec 31/2007; and scholarship applications even sooner than that. There's lots of paperwork to do. However, none of this makes a difference till I know my grades. So I wait....

The last two days I've been fighting off a virus of some sort, and have spent much of my time sleeping. While I don't relish being ill, sleeping makes the wait somewhat more palatable.

Life is on "pause"....